I will never go back to a contemporary church. But Sarah-never say never. In general, that’s wise advice; but in this case I feel pretty confident with my never. I’ve attended a large variety of churches from United Methodist to Assembly of God to Baptist to Presbyterian. I’ve been to big churches and small churchesContinue reading “A Tale of Two Churches”
Author Archives: widowedandwriting
Representation
One of the hardest parts about being a young widow is the feeling that you don’t quite fit. All of the other widows I know are older-you know the age people picture when they picture a widow. So I don’t quite fit with that group. When I’m with my peer group I realize I have differentContinue reading “Representation”
The Opening Line
For those of you who haven’t had the joy of online dating here’s a quick summary of how it works. You make a profile on the dating app of your choice (see this post for that process). Once that’s posted the app shows you profiles of singles in your area. You then swipe left orContinue reading “The Opening Line”
They’re Just Clothes
I donated the last of my husbands clothes today. I didn’t want it to be a big ‘thing.’ I wasn’t expecting it to be a thing. You see I had moved all of my husband’s clothes to the third floor when completing the second floor renovations. Then Covid happened and the renovations took much longerContinue reading “They’re Just Clothes”
Secondary Losses
When your person dies there are a lot of obvious losses, every moment of your day is affected by their absence. This early grief is acute and you drown in it. Time passes, you put in the work, and you move forward. You settle into your “new normal.” And it is here that the secondaryContinue reading “Secondary Losses”
Two Years
Deathiversery. That’s a fun new word I learned in widow world. It’s the anniversary of your loved one’s death. Ok, so it’s not actually a fun word. But what else do you call it? This is the day everything changed. A life was ended. It should have a name. Deathiversery. It feels almost cliché toContinue reading “Two Years”
Self-Care for my Widow Self
Self-care. What a trendy buzzword. But what does it really mean? Well, like I always tell my students, “when you come to an unknown word try breaking it down.” If you take it at face value it just means care for your self-care for you. Sounds simple, yet even my 8th graders could tell youContinue reading “Self-Care for my Widow Self”
You Should Make a Profile
I loved being married. I loved having a partner. And while I do believe I can have a happy, contented, fulfilled, meaningful life as a single woman; I would also like to be married again. But I’m not in high school anymore and I’ve already finished college…and grad school…and grad school again. Once you finishContinue reading “You Should Make a Profile”
You’re so Strong
**Quick disclaimer: I’m not mad at anybody who uttered this phrase to me. I don’t think anybody said it with malicious intent and I don’t necessarily think it’s a bad thing to say. But it always rubbed me the wrong way and today I want to explore why. ** It sounds like a compliment. ItContinue reading “You’re so Strong”
Redeemed
Redeemed. This was the hardest part of my grief journey to write about. Partly because it is still ongoing and partly because it is so profound-I don’t want to understate it. But mostly, it was hard because I worry that the take away will be, ‘phew, she’s all better now” or even worse “see, everythingContinue reading “Redeemed”
Widowed and Writing 